Wanker sparks health scare at Virgin Active

I saw this report in the Informante this morning! Unbelievable! B     Written by By Elvis Mboya

Wednesday, 28 January 2009

NUMEROUS clients at Windhoek's well-known health recreational centre, Virgin Active, were left dumbfounded last week after a middle-aged man was found masturbating and ejaculating in full view of the entrance to the male's sauna. Several clients at Windhoek's Virgin Active gym are still trying to come to terms with the wayward elderly client, who was caught masturbating and  eventually ejaculating whilst allegedly appreciating men in vicinity. Virgin Active's Duty Manager, Petrus Gurirab confirmed the incident but referred all enquiries to the gym's boss, Anuschka Davis. "This is a weird issue and I cannot discuss it with you," said Gurirab. The accused, Hendrik Kruger, when contacted for comment, said he offered no apologies to whoever was making complaints about him at the gym, and that he harboured no sexual intentions towards him whatsoever, as the complainant was not his type. "I had no intention to sleep with him. He is not even my type. He is not beautiful." The man, who sports a pair of tattoos that sandwich his private parts, frequents the gym during morning and afternoon peak hours, often shocking clients by masturbating whilst looking at other men in the shower. "The manager on duty (Gurirab) spoke seriously with him to desist from his fantasies because it not only inconveniences other gym users, but it is also unhealthy when he discharges semen on the floor," one irate client said. "He just comes to stare at guys and start dreaming about them," said another irate client. "He is fond of wanking while fantasising about the bodies of fellow naked men." When confronted by the gym's cleaners as to why he had taken to ejaculating all over the floor, Kruger was reportedly unapologetic. "Can't you see what I am doing? I am coming," he told them. Kruger claims his actions are the result of an illness. Davis confirmed the irate clients' complaints and promised to look into the matter. Kruger however, said he had already discussed the issue with the gym's management and as far as he was concerned, "everything has been resolved". According to Ahealth.com, Kruger's disorder falls under Psychological Paraphilia, better known as Voyeurism. Voyeurism is a male disorder that involves seeking sexual pleasure by secretly observing another person. Other names for the behaviour include "peeping" or "peeping Tom". The activity brings on sexual excitement and may end in masturbation. Voyeurism usually starts in adolescence and tends to persist into adulthood.

'There's a tapeworm in my food!'

Saw this on news24, just disgusting!

 

Stellenbosch - A Somerset West policeman says he had eaten half a tapeworm in his pork dish when he saw the rest of it lying on his plate at a Gordon's Bay restaurant.

Inspector Hennie Smit ordered eisbein - a traditional pork dish - while dining with his wife at the Sunset Bay Spur in Gordon's Bay last Thursday. Halfway through the meal, he saw 7cm long segments of the tapeworm lying on his plate.

Smit told on Wednesday how a piece of the remaining tapeworm was still stuck to the meat.

"At first I thought it was a sinew but then I saw the flat segments and realised it was a tapeworm."

Without saying a word to his wife, he got up and rushed to the restaurant's toilets.

"I spat out the food I was still chewing into the toilet, and then went to reception to report it," said Smit.

Apology

The woman told him that it was apparently not the first time that something like this had happened.

The manager on duty that day apologised, and suggested he order something else.

"The man didn't even look shocked when I informed him about the worm. I then ordered a piece of steak and two double whiskeys to get rid of the feeling."

But he had to pay for the rest of the drinks and the food.

A manager at this Spur said on Wednesday that neither he nor the staff were aware of the incident. He didn't want to comment

"We were regulars at the Spur, but I will never go to a Spur again," said Smit.

- Die Burger

3km-thick brown cloud over Asia

"How Now Brown Cloud?"

 

 

Beijing - A three-kilometre thick cloud of brown soot and other pollutants hanging over Asia is darkening cities, killing thousands and damaging crops, but may be holding off the worst effects of global warming, the UN said on Thursday.

The vast plume of contamination from factories, fires, cars and deforestation contains some particles that reflect sunlight away from the earth, cutting its ability to heat the earth.

"One of the impacts of this atmospheric brown cloud has been to mask the true nature of global warming on our planet," United Nations Environment Programme head Achim Steiner said at the launch in Beijing of a new report on the phenomenon.

'Silver lining' not that bright

The amount of sunlight reaching earth through the murk has fallen by up to a quarter in the worst-affected areas and if the brown cloud disperses, global temperatures could rise by up to 2 ° Celsius.

But the overall effect of slowing climate change is not the silver lining to a dark cloud that it appears to be.

The choking soup of pollutants may hold temperatures down overall, but the mix of particles means it is also speeding up warming in some of the most vulnerable areas and exacerbating the most devastating impacts of higher temperatures.

The complex impact of the cloud, which tends to cool areas near the surface of the earth and warm the air higher up, is believed to be causing a shortening of the monsoon season in India while increasing flooding there and in southern China.

Speeding up meltdown

Soot from the cloud is also deposited on glaciers, which are at the centre of environmentalists' and politicians' concerns because the glaciers feed Asia's key rivers and provide drinking water for billions.

There the particles capture more solar heat than white, reflective snow and ice - speeding up melting of a key resource. At a monitoring station near Mount Everest, soot has been found at levels which scientists say would be expected in urban areas.

There is also a high human cost. The report estimates round 340 000 people are dying prematurely because of damage to their lungs, hearts and risk of cancer.

Scientists are still studying the impact on crops, but possible problems include falling harvests because of less energy for photosynthesis and higher ozone concentrations.

There may also be damage from acidic and toxic particles in the cloud that land on plants, and wider changes to weather patterns may dry up or flood fields.

"The emergence of the atmospheric brown cloud problem is expected to further aggravate the recent dramatic escalation of food prices and the consequent challenge for survival among the world's most vulnerable populations," the report said.

Worldwide problem

One consolation, however, is that if the world stopped emitting the particles that form the cloud, it could be expected to vanish in weeks, unlike many longer-lasting greenhouse gasses.

The ingredients that make up the cloud are little different from the smog that cloaks many of the world's large cities, particularly in developing nations.

But scientists have realised this local pollution is a global problem, because of the way it rises and spreads.

"We used to think of the brown cloud as a regional-scale urban problem, now we know because of fast transport it travels vertically for three to four kilometres and spreads," said Professor Veerabhadran Ramanathan, head of the UN scientific panel which is carrying out the research.

There are similar brown clouds over parts of Europe, North America, Africa and the Amazon Basin, though research so far has been focused on the Asian cloud which stretches from the Arabian Peninsula to the Pacific Ocean.